


for you.

by houseuponthehill



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Best Friends, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Smut, F/F, Feelings Realization, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Light Angst, Slow Updates, Unresolved Emotional Tension
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-12
Updated: 2020-10-12
Packaged: 2021-03-08 01:02:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,791
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26977042
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/houseuponthehill/pseuds/houseuponthehill
Summary: Bellatrix and Hermione had been the most inseparable of friends ever since they met during Hermione's third year of University. Six years later, Bellatrix's bubble of denial and repressed feelings popped when Hermione announced her engagement. Emotions came to surface and their friendship shifted, leaving them with a hard choice.
Relationships: Background Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger & Bellatrix Black Lestrange, Hermione Granger/Bellatrix Black Lestrange
Comments: 18
Kudos: 50





	for you.

**_I dream a highway back to you_ **

· · ·

She was quietly humming to herself as she made her way through the grocery store, looking around. It was late in the afternoon on a weekday, meaning the store was nearly empty, allowing the woman a quiet moment to herself. As she was reaching to one of the top shelves in the cereal aisle, a woman’s voice interrupted her.

“Bellatrix?”

Bellatrix, cursing to herself the moment she recognized the voice, turned around to find a smiling Jean Granger approach her.

“Bellatrix!”

“Jean!” She answered nervously as she accepted the hug coming from the older woman.

“When did you come back?” Asked the woman excitedly as she pulled away, her hands staying on Bellatrix’s shoulders, which she squeezed warmly, the smile still on her face. “Hermione didn’t say anything.” Added the woman.

That made the younger woman falter in her words slightly, “Yes, I– I haven’t really told anyone other than Andy and Cissy.”

“Oh,” The woman said, pausing as she looked at Bellatrix knowingly for a fleeting moment before smiling warmly once again. “Well, I’m glad you’re back, darling. I’ll leave you to it, but please come visit us soon, we want to hear all about your adventures.”

“Of course, Jean. Thank you.” Answered Bellatrix softly with a small nod.

“Take care, darling.”

* * *

Jazz music was playing softly from the speakers in the living room, filling the small loft apartment with its soothing melody. Bellatrix was in the kitchen area cooking dinner, a glass of red wine in her free hand as she hummed lightly to the song and took a sip.

The apartment, in one of the most peaceful neighbourhoods in the city, was a nice reprieve from the hustle of the city. Bellatrix had just moved back to the country and still had a lot of unpacking to do, which explained the piles of boxes that were still around the place.

As she turned off the stove, a strong knock on the door disturbed her evening of peace. Leaving the wine on the kitchen counter, she made her way to the door and opened it.

“You _asshole_!” Was the first thing she heard before she could even register who it was. Standing in front of her with a shocked expression and slightly breathless (probably from the stairs) was Hermione Granger, her absolute favourite person in the world and who was, undoubtedly, furious at her with every right to be so.

The slightly taller woman had crossed her arms while her friend registered the moment and was staring at her with pursed lips and a frown on her face, tapping her foot impatiently.

“Well? Are you at least going to invite me in?” She finally asked, almost snapping at the lack of response from her friend. Hermione didn’t even wait for an answer, she simply walked in, critically surveying the space, but before she could turn to look at her friend again, Bellatrix was the one turning her around and pulling her into a bruising hug.

At that, Hermione’s resolve slowly started to crumble and she eventually returned the hug, just as hard, burying her face in her friend’s curls.

“You’re an asshole, Bellatrix Black.” She repeated in a whisper, this time significantly less aggressively.

The other woman nodded before she tightened her grip. “I know.”

They stood in the middle of the cramped living room for a few more moments before they slowly started to separate.

“I’m mad at you.” Stated Hermione with a stern expression, at which her friend nodded again.

“I know.” Responded Bellatrix, a small smile appearing on her face. They kept staring at each other a moment longer before Bellatrix got pulled back to reality. “I’ve missed your face.” She said, smiling at her friend. Hermione in response simply rolled her eyes and crossed her arms.

“Oh, um,” Started Bellatrix nervously, suddenly averting her friend’s gaze and starting to walk towards the kitchen area. “Would you like something to drink?” She asked, even as she was already grabbing the bottle of wine along with a glass. She poured some into it and refilled hers, and returned the bottle, just as Hermione was walking towards the kitchen island and sitting on one of the stools.

Bellatrix took her glass and gulped it almost in one go, earning a unbelieving look from her friend that was laced with concern. Not that Bellatrix noticed, as she was still averting brown eyes. She abruptly put back the glass on the counter before finally looking back at her friend.

Hermione raised an eyebrow and stared for a moment before sighing. “Where have you been, Bella?” She asked worriedly, but with a hint of curiosity.

“Oh, you know,” Answered the woman as she gestured vaguely with her hands, “Just traveling. I was around the UK for a while and then I decided to visit Europe.”

“For almost a year? And you couldn’t answer my calls? Just a few lousy messages telling me that you’re fine but not to text you? And now you’re here and I had to find out from my mum? My _mum_ , Bella. You know how that makes me feel after a year of radio silence?” Hermione said, sadness clear on her face.

Bellatrix momentarily closed her eyes while sighing, her shoulders slumping. “I’m sorry–”

“Fuck off, Bella. I’ve been replaying our last day together all this time, wondering if I was the one who drove you away.” Interrupted Hermione, her words coming out quickly. “And I’m sorry for some of the things I said but you also messed up.”

_September, 2007_

_“Bella?” Asked Hermione as she walked into her friend’s bedroom, waking her up from her nap._ _The older woman got startled by Hermione’s hand on her shoulder and abruptly turned to look at her friend, who was staring at her wide-eyed._

_“Hermione,” She started, rubbing her eyes, “I’m taking away your key privileges.” She grumbled. “What’s wrong?”_

_Hermione walked to the side and sat next to the still-lying form of her friend, her back against the headboard. She sighed. “I don’t know where to start.” She admitted._

_“Well, the beginning usually helps.” Answered the other woman, causing the brunette to roll her eyes._

_“Ron,” She started after a few moments of gathering her thoughts._

_A muffled noise could be heard from Bellatrix, whose head was still buried in the pillows. “What’s he done now?” Asked the other woman, looking up momentarily._

_“He– I,” Started Hermione as she fidgeted nervously with the keys in her hands. “He– proposed?”_

_That seemed to fully wake up Bellatrix, as she suddenly looked up, a shocked look on her face._

_“Is that a question?” Said Bellatrix as she carefully sat next to her friend. “And…? How did he react?”_

_“Well, he was ecstatic, of course. But now–”_

_“Wait, wait, wait– he– you said_ yes _?” Interrupted Bellatrix, sitting up._

_“Of course– I– did you think I’d turn him down?”_

_The woman snorted, “Well,” She paused, “Is now the best time to get married?”_

_“What do you mean?” Asked Hermione a touch defensive._

_“Well, you’re moving to New York in less than six months, love. Maybe–”_

_“That’s not happening anymore.” Cut off Hermione, her tone softer as she looked down, now fidgeting with the new ring. The action didn’t go unnoticed by Bellatrix, who pointed at it and raised an eyebrow. “You’re turning down the opportunity of your fucking life for a wedding?” She asked, a look of disbelief on her face._

_“No! Of course not.”_

_“Then what? Hermione I swear to God if you don’t go–”_

_“My dad got diagnosed with cancer.” She interrupted. “Liver cancer. Stage 4.”_

_Bellatrix fell quiet at that and got closer to her friend. “I’m so sorry.” She whispered after a few moments, wrapping an arm around Hermione and using her free hand to bring one of Hermione’s to her lap as she started to draw circles on its back. She then kissed her temple and brought Hermione closer to her, tightening her grip. The younger woman leaned into the embrace and buried her face on the crook of Bellatrix’s neck. After a few moments of silence, Bellatrix felt tears on her skin and Hermione’s shoulders shake. She squeezed Hermione’s arm and kissed her temple again._

_“They say he’s lucky if he lasts a year.”_

_“And mum–” She started, taking a deep breath, “She’s– I mean she’s trying to hold it together, but God– I don’t think she’s slept since they told them.”_

_“God, Bella, she looked_ drained _when I went to visit and I’d no idea why, and then when they told me–” She stopped, a sob escaping her._

_“And he doesn’t want us to hurt more so he’s been more cheerful than usual– which you can imagine, and I mean, he’s the one who’s dying for fuck’s sake!” She finished, crying more and holding onto Bellatrix tighter._

_They stayed wrapped in each other for a long time. Hermione breaking the silence at some points, letting out all her thoughts to a calming Bellatrix, who just stayed there, letting her friend vent. At some point, the older woman had covered them with the duvet when Hermione had fallen asleep, and she was silently looking out the window, watching the raindrops against the glass, their soft sound and Hermione’s breathing all that could be heard in the dimly lit bedroom. Afternoon had long gone and it was almost dark outside. Hermione had been sleeping for a while and Bellatrix decided to lie so that she was facing her. Her friend looked peaceful, even if her under eyes looked puffy from crying. She was breathing softly and her face was half buried in the pillow. A strand of hair was on her face and Bellatrix carefully pushed it back. Hermione looked so calm she didn’t stop to think before she ran her thumb over the soft cheek and dragged it down her neck, the action causing the younger woman to open her eyes. Still with the remnants of sleep, she looked curiously at her friend, but before she could say anything, the sound of heavy rain caught her attention and she turned to look through the window._

_Frowning, she asked, “What time is it?”_

_“Almost seven.”_

_“Oh, then I think I should go.”_

_“What? You’ll drown if you go out.” Bellatrix said dramatically._

_Hermione laughed softly, “No, I won’t.” She said, stretching._

_Bellatrix smiled at her, “No, but why don’t you stay anyway? I can prepare dinner and then we can watch a film. I’ll even let you choose one with Jennifer Anniston in it.”_

_“Oh, wow, someone’s feeling generous.” Teased the other woman before her smile widened. “Okay. Then I’m staying the night as well.”_

_“Of course.”_

_They got out of bed and went to the kitchen. Bellatrix started preparing dinner after sending Hermione to pick the film, after the brunette had insisted on helping Bellatrix cook, even if they both knew Hermione couldn’t cook if her life depended on it._

_After a while, Hermione reappeared in the kitchen, a smile on her face. “I picked the one.” She announced triumphantly._

_Bellatrix raised an eyebrow, “Just– out with it.” She said letting out a defeated sigh._

_“Along Came Polly,” She smirked, “Starring Jennifer Aniston_ and _Ben Stiller.”_

_Bellatrix suppressed a groan, “I didn’t even know I had that one.”_

_“I know, I brought it over last Halloween.”_

_“You know, it should be very telling that you considered that apt for Halloween.”_

_They took dinner to the small coffee table in the living room and sat on the floor next to it. They started eating in comfortable silence, until they both decided to speak at the same time._

_“This is amazing–”_

_“So, about Ron–”_

_“Oh.” Smiled Hermione. “What about Ron?”_

_Bellatrix looked hesitant before continuing. “Are you sure about him?”_

_“Bella,” Chuckled Hermione, “I’ve been with him for over two years.”_

_“That’s not an answer.”_

_“It is. I love him. I_ want _this.” She said resolutely before warily looking at her friend. “Bella, I know he’s not your favourite person–”_

_She got interrupted by Bellatrix’s scoff and she threw her a warning look before continuing, “But,” She looked intently at the woman, “I need you to try. For me, Bella. He’s going to be in my life for the rest of it.” Her face softened, “So are you. So_ please _, make an effort with him. If you really gave him a chance, he would surprise you.”_

_The older woman scoffed again as she rolled her eyes. “I was surprised the first time I watched him eat, alright.” She said._

_“Bella!” Said Hermione while shaking her head, “That’s not trying.”_

_“Hermione,” Started the woman, sighing deeply, “You– he’s just…”_

_“He’s just what?” Asked Hermione, finally snapping._

_“Not good enough for you.”_

_It was Hermione’s turn to scoff as she crossed her arms. “No one I’ve ever been with has been good enough for me according to you.”_

_“Okay, but Ron? Hermione, you two are just_ so _different. Anyone could see that.”_

_“What are you talking about? We have so many things in common!”_

_Bellatrix rolled her eyes, “He’s the most uninteresting person I’ve ever met.”_

_“That’s not true.”_

_“He goes hunting with his_ whole _family on the weekends. Tell me what you have in common with someone like that.”_

_“It’s not_ every _weekend.”_

_“You’re a vegetarian.” Deadpanned the woman._

_“Okay, maybe that bothers me, but he’s got so many good qualities!”_

_“Like what? He made fun of you for_ years _because you were the best in your year!”_

_“He’s come a long way since then. People change, Bella._ You _changed. You used to be a bit bratty yourself.” Hermione quipped, throwing her a knowing look._

_Bellatrix didn’t have a counter argument for that and simply stayed silent._

_“People change, is the point.” Hermione said._

_“People change, but they don’t change. There’s only so much one can do.”_

_Hermione sighed deeply, a pained expression forming. “Okay, Bella. This was fun, but seriously, I need you to try. You’ve never really tried with him.” She said, “Or anyone I’ve dated for that matter.”_

_“No one’s been worthy of you.”_

_“Enough, Bella! I’ve always been supportive of your choices! Remember Rod?" She asked raising an eyebrow. "I sat there and smiled_ every _time you brought him over, and– and Alecto? God, she was such an asshole! And I was nothing but nice to her even after she almost killed my cat!”_

_“Okay, in all fairness, that was probably an accident.”_

_“Probably?!”_

_“Probably.” Was the mumbled response._

_The younger woman took a deep breath in an attempt to calm herself down._

_“The point is, I’ve tried and I’ve been there for you throughout your massive fuck ups. I’m asking you to do the same for me.”_

_“So you_ do _admit this is a fuck up, then?”_

_“God, Bella!” Said Hermione, standing up and putting her face in her hands, frustrated._

_The other woman stood up as well._

_“Hermione,” She started, approaching the brunette. “I think he’s going to hold you back.” She started softly. “Fuck, he already is!”_

_“What–”_

_“New York.” Answered Bellatrix before needing to hear the rest of the question. “You get offered a year in the most prestigious law firm in the US and you turn it down?”_

_“Bella, you already know that’s got nothing to do with Ron. My dad–”_

_“I think you’re using that as an excuse.”_

_“What?” Asked the woman incredulously._

_“I’ve known your dad for years, Hermione. And I bet my life he’s already told you a million times not to turn it down.” She said as she raised an eyebrow._

_Hermione was at a loss for words._

_Bellatrix looked at her expectantly. “Tell me I’m wrong.”_

_Hermione shook her head. “Even if he did, you expect me to just leave him during his last months? I’m not like you, Bella.” She said venomously._

_Bellatrix’s expression darkened noticeably. “What does that mean?”_

_“You left to Canada two days after your father died! And you claimed it was because you’d already accepted the scholarship, but that was not_ normal _, Bella! You run from_ everything _that makes you feel_ anything _! You left your two sisters behind and disappeared for nine months!”_

_“What does that have to do with anything? Ron’s holding you back and deep down you_ know _it!”_

_“Okay, I’m done, Bella! You’re the most stubborn person I’ve ever met! You made a mistake leaving so early when your dad died, and you’re making a mistake now not believing me when I tell you that Ron is a wonderful person! I_ know _you, Bella, please come around before it’s too late for our friendship.”_

_“You would put_ him _before me?”_

_Hermione shrugged her shoulders, “You’re putting_ you _before me.”_

_“Are you serious?” Asked the woman scathingly._

_“Bella, are you going to try with Ron or not?”_

_“I will if you go to New York.”_

_“Bella,” Started Hermione, looking more tired by the second. “I promise New York isn’t about Ron. It’s about my dad.”_

_Bellatrix laughed softly, shaking her head. She defeatedly sat on the couch. “You’re my favourite person in the entire world,” She began, “And I think you’re making the mistake of your life.” She finished mournfully. Hermione knew she wasn't talking about New York anymore._

_“Okay.” Said Hermione, nodding as she started walking towards Bellatrix’s bedroom. She emerged a few moments later having gathered her things._

_“If that’s where you stand–”_

_“It is.” Said Bellatrix resolutely._

_“Then I don’t think I want you at my wedding.”_

_“What?”_

_Hermione shrugged her shoulders with indifference, “If you think it’s the biggest mistake of my life, might as well save you the trouble of witnessing it.” She said, starting to walk towards the door._

_Bellatrix chuckled darkly, “Fine!” She said as she watched the woman go, standing up from the couch and walking after her. “Go have the twelve kids I’m sure he’s already planned!” She spat out._

_Hermione turned one last time, looking furious. “Go fuck yourself! I don’t want to see you ever again!” She shouted, slamming the door on her way out._

Slowly nodding, the older woman answered, “I know what I said was terrible, I was being selfish when I should've been happy for you–”

“And are you?” Interrupted Hermione in a demanding tone, the serious expression back on her face.

“What–”

“Happy for me, Bella. The wedding’s still happening. Are you happy for me?” She asked, and as an after thought added, “For me and for Ron.”

Bellatrix’s jaw clenched minimally, which didn't go unnoticed by Hermione, who chose not to acknowledge it, as she looked at her friend questioningly.

“I’m happy if you are.”

“Great.” Said Hermione. “Because I am. We both are.”

“Then that’s all I care about.”

“Good.”

“Great.” Added Bellatrix with a hint of sarcasm.

The tension in the room was palpable as they fell quiet for a few long moments.

“How’s your dad?” Asked Bellatrix, finally breaking the silence.

“He’s… he’s holding up.” Hermione shook her head, “God knows why– he’s in pain every single moment he’s not on drugs.” The woman looked at her friend intently, then. “This year– it’s been hell, Bella. And with you gone it's been even worse.” She added, looking down.

Bellatrix nodded, a regretful and pained expression on her face. “I kept tabs on you, you know. I asked Andy about you all the time.”

Hermione laughed breathily while shaking her head, before looking back up, tears welling in her eyes. “So why not call?” She asked, drying her tears aggressively with her sleeve. “You have no idea how much I’ve missed you.” She said. “You know, this has made me wonder so many times if our friendship was really that important to you, if you were so willing to just cut ties with me–”

“ _No_. This has been so fucking painful you don’t even know.” Interrupted Bellatrix. She stopped before hesitatingly saying, “I– I wanted to call, but I was honestly terrified.” She said quietly, looking down. “I didn’t know if you’d ever want to see me again.” She confessed.

The brunette laughed softly. “I love you so much.” She said. “Even when you're being an idiot.” She added with a small smirk. “I do think you owe me an explanation, though.”

“Hermione–”

“Please,” Said the woman, softer this time, as she stood up and approached her friend. “Just tell me what the hell is wrong. I _know_ you, _I_ know you, Bella.” She said gently. “There’s something you’re not telling me. I love you so much. I want to help if there’s something wrong, but I _need_ to know.” Hermione told her, a few tears streaming down her face.

Bellatrix closed the distance that was left and hugged her, tentatively at first, but as the woman hugged her back, she tightened her grip. They stayed there, in the middle of the kitchen for a while until Bellatrix spoke.

“I’m sorry I’ve been gone. I truly am. I hate that I hurt you, but please, don’t ask me to tell you why I left.”

“Bella–” Started Hermione, breaking the hug to look at her friend.

“Are you happy? With Ron, are you happy?” Interrupted Bellatrix.

“What?”

“Just– answer. Are you happy with him, truly?” She asked, staring intently into brown orbs.

“Yeah.” Was Hermione's answer, even if she had a confused expression.

Bellatrix swallowed hard and nodded slowly before a small, sad smile made its way into her face, and she looked down.

“Bella?” Asked the woman tentatively, putting her hand on her friend’s cheek, slowly lifting her head until black eyes were staring back at hers. “Why did– I know you and Ron haven’t always gotten along, but–”

“No.” Interrupted Bellatrix, shaking her head with a small smile, moving her hands to dry her friend’s tears from her cheeks. “He makes you happy. That’s all I need to know.” She said. “I’m happy if you are.” She repeated, hugging her friend once again. “And you’re getting married.” She whispered into the woman’s hair after a few moments, almost as if she was reminding herself of the fact.

They stood there for a while, Hermione at a loss for words, confused by the whole ordeal. Slowly, without realizing it, they started to move around almost lazily. The two friends started to sway carelessly to the melody of the song until they were fully slow dancing around the darkly lit space. Neither uttered a word as they moved around; they simply adjusted their positions so that Bellatrix’s arms circled Hermione’s waist, and Hermione’s arms were over Bellatrix’s shoulders, their foreheads touching and their eyes closed.

“I’ve missed you so much.”

“I love you.”

_Chapter title taken from Gillian Welch's song 'I Dream a Highway'._

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed!


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